Fact: I can pair root beers like people can pair wines. There is a right and wrong choice when selecting which brand of root beer you should have with cheese and cracker appetizers versus working in the yard.

Fact: Throughout my life I have been a tour guide for a number of locations, regardless of whether or not anyone asked me to be a guide, or anyone asked to go on a tour.

Fact: Improv comedy is just like a sport. Some people are naturally good at it, but everyone can do it with practice. Unlike all other sports, I am good at improv.

Fact: When you dissect the Nicolas Cage movie “Face Off” using Joseph Campbell’s monomyth theory, the moral of the film is the importance of family.

Fact: I can fake-smoke nine cigarettes at once, and I have photographic evidence to support this. No word on if I could actually smoke nine cigarettes at once, as I have never successfully smoked any cigarettes.

Fact: You cannot find anywhere online to watch or even order complete episodes of “Clean Sweep,” a reality TV show broadcast on TLC between 2003 and 2005. The show involved professional organizers helping people clear out and sort their cutter. I love getting rid of clutter, both mine and other people’s. It is personally painful to me that I cannot re-watch this show.

Fact: I am a white, cis-gender, heterosexual female living in America. I am so close to the full Privilege jackpot, but that one piece I’m missing causes such terrible trouble.

Fact: I am a writer. I can prove it. I wrote this.